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The feelings are there, just need a little more limp in my wrist.  

birdboy1968

12/20/2006 11:43 pm

Last Read:
8/27/2007 5:55 am

I'm from a small,"everybody knows everybody", desert town, spent 10 years active duty in the Air Force, and I have a few strongly devout "born-again" family members. I have been gay since I was a kid. I found out the same time my 2nd cousin realized that he too was gay. My problem is that I'm too straight acting for my own good. I've been in clubs and I've had alot of guys walk up and start hittin on me and within 2 minutes, Im having to almost prove my sexuality. My straight friends that know, still ask me if I'm sure cause I don't act like I'm gay. I try to act like some of the gay men I know. Talking more fem and making little changes in my appearance and in the end, I just feel weird and out of my element. It sucks to go out cause I always get the girliest acting man in the room wanting me to be his daddy. Not knowing that I am there too, looking for my daddy. Besides wearing a well wordded t-shirt, does anyone have some pointers for me?
TOP4youngBottom
472 posts 

12/21/2006 4:34 am

You have a great question and i look forward to hearing the response from others here on OP. One thing I will say though is just be who you are and don't try to acting out. Talk like you talk, walk like you walk and dress they way you feel comfortable. Being fake will show through. In the end you will be happier being yourself. OK OP members let help birdboy out and myself with some real answers.

Usaf19792000
40 posts 

12/21/2006 5:10 am

The previous responses are excellent. Don't try to "act gay." Remember Rock Hudson (you may not since you are so young)? He sure didn't act "gay." Remember "Broke Back Mountain?" Those guys sure didn't "act gay." Many of those businessmen you see in the local diner or at the grocery store may very well be gay but not the feminine type. I'm a bi-guy but most of the guys I have met over the years do not "act" gay. There are some guys who are very much feminine but the vast majority of guys are very masculine. Just be yourself...don't advertise anything. Be friendly to all you meet and I promise you that someone will "find" you and you will be glad to have been found!

Sport71
5432 posts 

12/21/2006 5:28 am

I hear ya brother. No guys would EVER approach me outside a gay bar. No vibe here. Limp wrist, not happening. No flamboyant mannerisms either. As much as I feel like a square peg in a round hole in the gay bars, I still think its a good place to go meet guys. For me, that is my only shot. Like I say, outside the bar just won't happen. I just look forward to the day that I don't have to go looking anymore!

Good luck!

Sport

~Sport~

fun14romance
2155 posts 

12/21/2006 6:34 am

If you're not being yourself, then you're not being honest. Putting on an act of any kind may get you noticed a bit more, but what happens when the other guy finds out you're not who he thought you were? All of the posters before me who told you to be yourself are right. Besides, would YOU be happy being someone other than yourself?

Paul

I would rather try and fail than never succeed because I failed to try

justlooking202
169 posts 

12/21/2006 11:27 am

I personally refuse to further the stereotype. I have however taken to providing some clues in my wardrobe (not that tough to do). I would say that you are better off finding someone who likes you for you. I personally am not attracted to the flamoyant type (at least none that I've met so far). By putting on a false front, you may end up attracting what you aren't looking for...

just my two cents...

Rick

bigguy075
293 posts 

12/21/2006 11:39 am

If guys are hitting on you, they are attracted to you, not a limp wristed caricature of a gay man.

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