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MIKA and the New PiC
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Aug 24, 2007 10:51 pm
805 Views
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So just wanted to post something new... i recently downloaded a full cd from itunes im not complaining real good artist... called MIKA.... sings a song called grace kelly and love today... real good cd so far... only listened to four of fourteen songs... not including the two mentioned lol otherwise that would be six... lol real good cd so far... check it out...
I keep seeing all these hot guys at work... and yes i keep checking them out... lol i got to learn how to stop doing that... but i guess i won't... lol i mean it is more fun checking them out than not to do it... hehe... im soooo dirty..
also if you were all wondering about my new lovely picture... it is a pic of me from this years pride parade... it was fun... hope you enjoy the pic... take care all
tim
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In the Dark
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Aug 22, 2007 11:55 am
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I'm leaving that post up i decided...... here are some more lyrics...
In The Dark by Tiesto.
DJ Tiësto & Christian Burns
When it seems
Like the world around you's breaking
And it feels
Like there's no one else around you
And it's quiet
There's a silence in the darkness
And it sounds
Like the carnival is over
As you walk
In the crowded empty spaces
And you stare
At the emptiness around you
You wanna go
To the city and the bright lights
Get away
From the sinners that surround you
Cause I will be there
And you will be there
We'll find each other in the dark
And you will see
And I'll see you too
Cause we'll be together in the dark
Cause if it's coming for you
Then it's coming for me
Cause I will be there
Cause we need each other in the dark
And if it terrifies you
Then it terrifies me
Cause I will be there
So we've got each other in the dark
As I look into the sky
There's sparks bright as ice
You want me to take you over there
I want you to stay with me
Cuz you're not the only one
The only one
No, no
Don't worry
You're not the only one
Cause if it's coming for you
Then it's coming for me
But I will be there
Cuz we need each other in the dark
And if it's panicking you
Then it's panicking me
But I will be there
So we've got each other in the dark
In the dark
In the dark
We'll need each other in the dark
In the dark
In the dark
We'll hold each other in the dark
Now we're saved together in the dark
Cause we've got each other in the dark
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I like this song... got a good beat and great lyrics... I just like how it says if you are alone you don't need to worry... cause someone is going to be a friend and will be there for you... Someone is going through everything you are going through.. and that they will be there for you and help you through the darkness or your problems whatever they may be...
It just makes me smile... and yet brings a tear to my eye if it's coming for you it's coming for me... so if people are going to harrass me for myself being gay... then my friends are also being harrassed as well... It just is a great feeling to listen to this song... it has a great message and is uplifting... you can apply this to anything... it will make you feel better... plenty of people go through things and others have too... and no one needs to face anything alone... 
other notes: So one of my friends from college wants me to come visit him in his state... and he is totally willing to go with me to a gay club near his town... i just started laughing... he is like yeah more people have come out of the closet to me... im like you know people can trust you, cause you are a trustworthy person... he is like yeah i know... im like you could hook me up if i visited you... he is like probably... im like yes!!! talk about me thinking dirtily... lol
all is good... and i feel like im having a wonderful day... whatever that means... its 91 up here in chicago... and humid as heck...  that is a downfall but im sure like the song says other people are going through it too.. so its all gravy... take care everyone... hope people enjoy my new post.. later
tim
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Sorry to the three who posted comments.... on last blog
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Aug 21, 2007 9:58 pm
774 Views
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Well sorry if i offended someone... i was trying not to offend anyone... i just meant to be thought provoking... and yes i know i asked a lot of questions about how i would view the general society has against gays... so in that aspect im sorry... as far as the other comments... im sorry... I didn't mean to upset so many people.... i will be deleting that one very soon. Sorry again guys... didn't really mean to just was trying to be thought provoking.... and only reason i was feeling crushed cause i was listening to the song... and letting it get to me... like the movie does... such a great movie... so im sorry... hope all is ok with you guys...
in other news: i had a great day at work today... i mean the mantenance guy was hot!!! i could have taken him to the washroom and done some fun stuff with him... yummy... lol
later...
tim
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Am I Wrong?
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Aug 21, 2007 12:16 am
802 Views
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Am I Wrong? - by Love Spit Love... from the Angus soundtrack.
there's too much
that i keep to myself
and i turn my back on my faith
it's like glass
when we break
i wish no one in my place
and i've seen
you don't need their seeds
when their dirt goes in deep
and i'm lost in sleep
i can't stay
in this place
I can't stand
When the room turns round
On my fate
You give no guarantees
There's no promise
I can keep
I can't stand
I can't see my way
I feel blind
On my feet
I can't stay too long
Am i wrong?
Goodbye, lay the blame on luck
Goodbye, lay the blame on luck
Goodbye, lay the blame on luck
Goodbye, lay the blame on luck
I'm so tired
Of my mood
And sleep comes
With a knife, fork and a spoon
You're so pale
In your face
You let life
Get in your way
And i've seen
You don't need their seeds
When their dirt goes in deep
And i'm lost in sleep
Am i wrong?
Goodbye, lay the blame on luck
Goodbye, lay the blame on luck
Goodbye, lay the blame on luck
Goodbye, lay the blame on luck
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~`
ok so i need to comment on this song. Yes this is one of my favorite songs... and also a great movie... and yes i can relate to the movie and song quite a lot...
there's too much
that i keep to myself... well yeah i have kept a lot to myself... for a long time... i could make tons of lists... me being gay, not dealing with emotions properly... umm hmmm i could keep going here...
and i turn my back on my faith... well i guess im gay so faith where did that one go...
it's like glass
when we break
i wish no one in my place... we are fragile but i know i am strong so when we break we all go into an emotional state... i am just sooo like i don't know...here.
and i've seen
you don't need their seeds
when their dirt goes in deep... well basically people have your secrets and they know how deep they can hurt you especially if you have friends who have turned out not to be friends...
Am i wrong? ... im not going to analyze the whole song just some parts... and this part i love... cause it asks am i wrong? well i like this... cause im going to ask am i wrong... with how i deal with people? am i wrong to not care if being gay is wrong or not acceptable. am i wrong for being who i am? am i wrong when it comes to realizing that others won't accept me for me. am i wrong realizing that if i was straight i wouldn't be happy, i would be miserable... am i wrong in embracing my gayness since i know its my chance at happiness... am i wrong to be hidden and live two lives when i should be living one gay life and be proud of it... am i wrong debating the idea that maybe i knew i was gay all along and maybe i wanted to be gay but secretly i knew it was wrong to be gay... am i wrong that i think i knew i was gay long before i told others when i thought i was gay... i just never fully admitted it to myself... am i wrong to realize that i probably have been gay all my life but rejected it because i thought it was wrong... Am i wrong to think that being gay isn't that bad... Am I wrong being myself? Am i wrong having a little extra weight since it is all my genes... am i wrong to think that gay people are going to hell? am i wrong to think the bible is not right? Am i wrong to think that Jesus created everyone equally and you should love one another no matter who it is... yes including gay people too... Am I wrong to be such a caring person that i sometimes realize i am taken advantage of? Am I wrong in developing friendships and then see them crumble like the berlin wall... Am I wrong to think i might actually make friends and think that i might actually keep them as friends? Am I wrong... in so far trying to deliver a perfect blog... even though i know no one is quite perfect? Am i wrong because i have my own problems that are just so right or wrong. Am i wrong crying just because i know this song tugs at my heart because it rings soo true... and also reminds me of the movie... knowing that i am different... Am i wrong because im different and gay.... and like men... am i wrong cause i can admit it...and yes homosexuality "supposedly" is a sin... but yet it is forgiven... Am i wrong in thinking equality is for everyone even gays... am i wrong admitting that there are far more evils in this world than homosexuality... am i wrong in thinking bad thoughts of misguided representation.. Am I wrong to think i can get a boyfriend... am i wrong to realize that sex is fun... and that protection is key to sucess... am i wrong in wanting to be true to myself to the point of being disowned by my family... am i wrong wanting to lose weight but yet still get tortured in the frame of society... am i wrong to think that everyone has their cruel moments.... am i wrong to think that people can be mean... am i wrong to realize i have friends that care about me... Am i wrong thinking i might be right... but the world is all wrong? Am i wrong or am i right? Why Am i so wrong?
Am I wrong?
I had to post this blog... cause it asks so many questions just by saying am i wrong?
hope i didn't offend someone... but had to post this... i love the song... Am I Wrong by Love Spit Love and the movie Angus...
would love to hear the comments on this one... take care
tim
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Saturday huh?
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Aug 19, 2007 9:14 pm
752 Views
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Well saturday came and went... his friends didn't have any money and neither did he... lol but his friends ditched him... how rude was that... i even offerred to pay for things if he wanted to go out...  well should say i opted and talked to him for twenty minutes... lets just say... hmm... i might be having a boyfriend again... but enough of that...
im going to post some lyrics soon that i feel is just a great song... and some other stuff too... i have seemingly found a stable ground after my months of not knowing what to do with my whole gayness... but now i feel as though i have matured quite a bit... odd to say that... but i have... and it feels good... well who knows.. hope things are well with everyone... later
tim
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Automatic!! Cheer up Kyler!!
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Aug 16, 2007 10:18 pm
704 Views
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So i just had to post something... i realize a lot of good people here need something to read... Kyler, so come by and enjoy these lyrics... it is Ultra Nate called Automatic:
Look what you're doing to me
I'm utterly at your whim
All of my defenses down
Your camera looks through me
With its X-ray vision
And all systems run aground
All I can manage to push from my lips
Is a stream of absurdities
Every word I intended to speak
Wind up locked in the circuitry
No way to control it
It's totally automatic
Whenever you're around
I'm walking blindfolded
Completely automatic
All of my systems are down
Down down down
Automatic
Automatic
What is this madness
That makes my motor run
And my legs too weak to stand
I go from sadness
To exhilaration
Like a robot at your command
My hands perspire and shake like a leaf
Up and down goes my temperature
I summon doctors to get some relief
But they tell me there is no cure
They tell me
No way to control it
It's totally automatic
Whenever you're around
I'm walking blindfolded
Completely automatic
All of my systems are down
Down down down
Automatic
Automatic
I just love this song... not only does it make me laugh but check out the video on youtube... lol doing the video with these lyrics... immediately makes me think of sex... no other way to put it... LMAO hope that brings a smile to everyone's faces... yes even to yours kyler... i also enjoy this song great dance beat.... but yeah it just gets me feeling good.. knowing that someone can make you feel that way... automatic... or as i think of things... as in my gay life... it's just automatic when a hot guy is around lol...well just hope things get better and hope u r happy.
other side note: Just felt like posting something fun or happy... love that song... hehe... everything is ok... im supposed to be going out for his birthday saturday... and for some reason i don't think im ready for it... hehe.... so who knows... ill let you know how saturday goes... but take care all hope the lyrics cheered people up... take care all
tim
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Hormones+telling family=out?
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Aug 15, 2007 11:15 am
848 Views
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I just wanted to make another post today... so out of no where early this morning about 5 am i woke up with a huge hard on... none i have ever felt that so vibrant... and felt like i couldn't move much lol... but anyhow i know why i was feeling it.. i had thoughts about the person i was on the phone with the night before lol... knowing there could be a chance with him... lol since quoting his exact words... he was talking to me... and not the other guy... all i know is... He enjoyed the time we spent together when we were together... im not giving in on anymore details... that is why he was calling me back... go me!!
So sometime in early october i have a vacation... yay break from my jobs well needed if i might say so myself... who knows where or how long im going... but what to see people to visit or do? i know dirty minds... LMAO... hehe
cut to: Who knows what else will happen shortly in the coming months... maybe even who knows.. hinting maybe even telling my overgrown family of myself... i don't know about that... any advice? honestly... well let me know whats up everyone... i have been thinking about doing that quite a bit lately... hate having to be hidden or sheltered all the time... so let me know your advice... later all
tim
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Hard Day at work!
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Aug 14, 2007 9:53 pm
799 Views
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so yeah today was kind of good... i realized something all too well... i enjoyed this new gay boy they hired at my one job... a little too much... eye candy to the fullest and a great personality to boot... and can i say... he is damn sexy... mmm mmm good... its going to be hard to work with him...  in more ways than one... lol
in other news: i don't got to wait till september to talk to the friend... he called tonight real odd... found out that he doesn't like the mystery date person too much... hmm what a surprise.. should say ex... and should say feelings were not as strong as he thought.. sounds like my chances have been upgraded to better... lol well who knows what else is brewing... up for him to decide lol.. not sure what else to post... just thought i would let you know that my life is getting more hectic lol... well later all take care
tim
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hmmph wait till september... Too Long!!
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Aug 13, 2007 10:11 pm
796 Views
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To answer Lovah's question it is a Gay club in downtown Chicago.
So today was ok... i guess i saw a few more hot guys while i was driving to work... lol i know dangerous for me huh?
lol and actually waiting on a hot guy too at my first job... i was like oh... nice american eagle polo.... yummy... is all i gotta say.. i love seeing hot guys at my jobs... or on the way to them..
I guess im just kinda upset a little i know last post said aggravated... well my friend didn't call me back and now he has gone on his month cruise... lucky him... so i won't be able to talk to him until september... so... i guess i would have liked to know where i stood with him sooner... but oh well i guess i gotta wait till september and keep my mind off of the subject of where i stand... lol cause i thought we had a shot of getting back together... but who knows.. guess now that he was on that date... i highly doubt it... well maybe we can be friends.. as a consolation prize... whatever that is.. lol well don't know what else to type... my mind is on numbing right now... later
tim
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yeah?
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Aug 12, 2007 7:10 pm
957 Views
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So this weekend was quite fun... went to Circuit for the first time... it was entertaining...
just had to post something... since i was away... thanks for whoever has read my blog... whatever that means... well i guess ill talk to u all later
tim
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