Ladies working minds.....
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May 6, 2009 2:28 am
811 Views
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A dentist noticed that his next patient, a lady, was nervous so he decided to tell her a little joke as he put on his gloves.
"Do you know how they make these gloves?" he asked.
"No, I don't," she replied.
"Well," he spoofed, "there's a building in Canada with a big tank of latex and workers of all hand sizes walk up to the tank, dip in their hands, let them dry, then peel off the gloves and throw them into boxes of the right size."
She didn't crack a smile.
"Oh, well. I tried," he thought.
But five minutes later, during a delicate portion of the procedure, she burst out laughing.
"What's so funny?" he asked
"I was just envisioning how condoms are made!"
You got to watch those little old ladies! Their minds are always working!
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My experience to new world...
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Dec 18, 2008 4:02 am
980 Views
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It was a Friday night heading back to my home when the rain started. I didn't have an umbrella with me and I proceeded to get soaked. I ran to a strip mall for cover and hurried into the only place open, a hair salon. The guy working there, San.., was just getting ready to close the store, as it was just a few minutes before 9:00. He took pity on me and told me he had a clothes dryer in the back and that he would loan me some sweatpants to wear while my clothes dried. I was still a long way to go, so I took him up on his offer. He led me to the back office and left me while I changed into his sweats and a tee-shirt.
While my clothes were drying, I suggested I go ahead and get a haircut. He shut off the lights in the front of the store and locked the door (since he was closed), and then gave me a haircut.
Sanjay was in his mid-forties & owner of salon. He just looked masculine. Anyway, we chatted while he cut my hair. My hair was pretty easy to cut, so my clothes were still wet when we were done. He had offered to drive me to my residence, which I greatly appreciated, so I was going to hang out there until the clothes were dry. We were sitting in his office when he suggested a massage. Having nothing else to do, I agreed. So we went into another back room where he had a massage table. He handed me a towel and told me to get undressed and he'd be right back. So I stripped out of his clothes, wrapped the towel around my waist and laid down on the table.
He came back and put on some relaxing music. He poured oil onto his hands and began massaging my shoulders. It felt really good. He moved down my lower back and asked if he could remove my towel. I said sure and he opened the towel and began rubbing my butt cheeks. At this point, I realized I was getting aroused. And this confused me because it was a guy touching me! He worked his way down my legs and feet then asked me to turn over. I was uncomfortable about this because my cock was getting hard but I couldn't refuse so I rolled over. I kinda muttered something about being sorry about my situation. He looked at my cock then told me not to worry about it - a lot of people got aroused during massages.
As he massaged my chest, he asked me about girlfriends. I was not dating anyone at the time and I told him I hadn't been with a girl for some time. His hands moved down to my thighs, and I closed my eyes, trying to will my cock back down. That's when he touched me. Very lightly, but his hands were brushing against my cock. I opened my eyes a bit and saw him staring at my cock and then grasping it. I opened my eyes further and he looked at me and said, "It's alright, let me do this for you." I closed my eyes again as I realized how much I was enjoying him touching me. He was stroking me up and down now, leaving little doubt as to his intentions.
 Then he let go. I heard him rustling around and I looked to see him undressing. He stripped down to just his black bikini briefs, which were holding a very full bulge. I couldn't believe I was laying here naked with a guy touching me, and I was checking him out as he got nearly naked.
 He came back and began stroking me again. Then he leaned over and took my cock in his mouth. I was not the world's expert on blowjobs, but I'd had a few. And this guy was sucking my cock better than any girl had ever sucked me. I couldn't believe how good it felt and I knew I was not going to last long. I watched as he sucked my cock into his mouth. He had also reached down and freed his own cock from his briefs and was
stroking it as he sucked me. Before I knew what I was doing, I was reaching over and had my own hand on his cock. He stopped sucking me and looked up at me and smiled. He dropped his own hand and left mine to stroke him.
His cock felt so good in my hand. It was so nice and hard and probably an inch bigger than my own seven inches. He stepped up closer toward me as I reached out and stroked him with both hands. He leaned over and sucked on my nipples then moved back down to my cock. "I want to finish you off," he said. He sucked my cock all the way into his mouth with incredible suction and almost immediately I was bucking my hips as my cum exploded into his hot mouth.
His mouth never left my cock as I came. At last, when I was done coming, he slipped his mouth from my cock and moved up, his head over mine. He smiled at me as he leaned in and put his lips to mine. We kissed and he opened his mouth and let some of my own cum spill into my mouth. It was so wildly erotic that I dove my tongue forward and lapped at it greedily. As I swallowed some of my own hot cum, he broke the kiss. "You're pretty wild," he said. I gave him a smile and told him I had never done anything like this before. He just smiled as he raised up from leaning over to kiss me and brought his cock to the edge of the table. He put his hands on my head and pulled me to the edge of the table. "Suck me," he said. "I think you'll like it."
And I wanted to. Badly. So I opened my mouth and he slid his cock in. I ran my tongue all over his cock and he continued to thrust forward. This position wasn't working really well so he helped me down off the table and put me on my knees. He held my head as he slid his cock back into my mouth. "Relax your jaw," he said as I was fighting a gag reflex. He pulled out, I relaxed, and I moved forward for his cock because I wanted it in my mouth - I wanted to taste his cum.
I reached up and played with his balls as he began to fuck my face. He was sliding further into my mouth now, and I loved it. He began moaning and tensing and all of a sudden, his cock was erupting inside my mouth, filling it with his hot cum. I loved the taste and swallowed quickly as I worked his cock for more. He continued to cum and as he filled my mouth again, he pulled out and jerked his cock, shooting his cum on my face as I savored what was in my mouth.
"Wow," he said. "You're some cocksucker - are you sure you've never done that before?" With cum on my face and lips and loving it, I looked up at him. "I'm sure, but I know my first time isn't gonna be my last." He smiled and wiped his cock against my face, and I sucked it into my mouth to suck it clean.
This was my first exp. I got up and followed him to get dressed, my cock already getting hard again.
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Touch of elder man....
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Sep 18, 2008 6:23 am
1089 Views
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I met him thru friend. He was my friends uncle. I & my friend went to his uncle place for paper. My friend papers get finish 6 days earlier. So he went back to his home as their was some urgent work and I have to live with his uncle for rest of my paper days. He was older, maybe in his fities. Other day of my friend gone, he walked towards me. I was most surprised to see him naked and more surprised when he walked over to me and put his hand on my crotch, rubbing it gently.
He continued rubbing for a minute. I was totally mum and there was no words spoken between us. I was like wht I am doing as I was totally surrending to his sexy touches, as I was liking his touch. He opened his arms and I moved into them as he wrapped them around me, holding me to him in an almost desperate hug. I stood there for a minute in his bear hug and then leaned back to look at his face. He looked me right in the eyes and then leaned down to kiss me gently on the lips. It was a small kiss, more of a peck but his lips were smooth and soft.
As he leaned back to look at me, I'm sure he was looking for a sign from me and without hesitation I leaned into him again and sought out his mouth with mine and we kissed more passionately. I opened my mouth wider and accepted his tongue in my mouth, gently sucking on it as he explored my mouth and at the same time, rub my crotch gently with his big hands. I was hard in an instant and I felt him lowering the zipper on my jeans. He soon had his big hand wrapped around my cock, gently pulling on it and rubbing his hand up and down its length. As if he knew I was close to coming, he stopped kissing me and take my cock in his mouth. He gently sucked my entire length into his mouth, sucking on it as if it was candy. He slowly sucked on my hard cock and pumped his mouth up and down it's length until he had me coming again. He then stood up and started rubbing my cock with his hand again as he leaned into me and kissed me on the lips.
He continued to kiss me for a moment and the leaned back, taking his hand off my cock. He said he wanted to taste my cum, taking my cock into his mouth again. He sucked harder this time and I came in his mouth, he swallowed every single drop of my cum, which made me totally surprise. After I was finished, he stood up again, kissed me and covered his tongue into my mouth, forcing me to swallow the bit of come he had on his tongue. I swallowed and tasted myself on his tongue as he explored my mouth again. I knew I too have to cum him so, I reached inside his pants and pulled out his cock very gently as it was hard and erect. I slowly moved my hands up and down its length. He was moaning almost whimpering, as I continued to bring him to organism and I knew that he was cumming.
When he came, he gushed a full load into my face, chest. He cried out in pleasure as he came. He finally finished and I stood up, leaning towards him to kiss him.
We stood there for a few minutes, kissing and sucking tongues until he leaned back and looked at me and then he spoke, asking me if I was interested for next time. I dont know but I couldnt give him any answer just a smile.
Next day on dinner table he smiled mischievous at me. He drove to the institute for paper and went ahead for his office. On last final day of paper, I was totally relaxed and arrived at home. He was waiting there passionately for me. He gave me a hug and a kiss and motioned me to follow him to his bedroom.
We sucked each other for a few hours. While sucking he slide one or two fingers slowly. Soon I collapsed in his mouth, he swallowed every single drop of my cum and I moved back into his arms again, more to rest than anything. Until I had to leave to take my train. That was my best three days of my new world experience of pleasure and enjoy each others body to the utmost.
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The New Supermarket
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Mar 1, 2009 3:31 am
627 Views
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The new Supermarket near our house has an automatic water mister to keep the produce fresh. Just before it goes on, you hear the sound of a thunderstorm and the smell of fresh rain.
When you appraoch the milk cases, you hear cows mooing and witness the scent of fresh butter fat.
When you approach the egg case, you hear hens cackle and the air is filled with the pleasing aroma of eggs frying.
So far I have been too afraid to go down the toilet paper aisle.
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Good one.....
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Feb 18, 2009 4:43 am
418 Views
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After having failed his exam in "Logistics and Organization", a student goes and confronts his lecturer about it.
Student: "Sir, do you really understand anything about the subject?"
Professor: "Surely I must. Otherwise I would not be a professor!"
Student: "Great, well then I would like to ask you a question.
If you can give me the correct answer, I will accept my mark as is and go. If you however do not know the answer, I want you give me an "A" for the exam. "
Professor: "Okay, it's a deal. So what is the question?"
Student: "What is legal, but not logical, logical, but not legal, and neither logical, nor legal?"
Even after some long and hard consideration, the professor cannot give the student an answer, and therefore changes his exam mark into an "A", as agreed. Later on the professor calls on his best student and asks him the same question.
He immediately answers: "Sir, you are 63 years old and married to a 35 year old woman, which is legal, but not logical. Your wife has a 25 year old lover, which is logical, but not legal. The fact that you have given your wife's lover an "A", although he really should have failed, is neither legal, nor logical."
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